You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
youre lurking in front of me
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Randomize
