bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
