so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I have aggressive nipples.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
