Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
