Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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