Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
