hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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