went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
My ass is underappreciated
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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