I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize