wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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