Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
