We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
