What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
