508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
