He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
false alarm, still single
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
