I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
