South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
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