...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
