broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
