he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize