I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Four minutes until I can fart!
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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