I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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