I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
