Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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