so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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