It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
You ruined the universe
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
