Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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