Buhtt sex?
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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