I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
