so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
