just tell him i said nine months
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize