Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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