Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Randomize
