i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Still dying that you shit outside
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
