Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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