Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
You've changed since you got that strap on
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
