I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
there was a trapeze. enough said
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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