I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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