her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
