office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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