Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
