It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I am naked and annoyed.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
