i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
