So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Randomize
