Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
