How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Randomize
