I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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