You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
