The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
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