Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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