Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
